70 Things Millenials have killed and my answers

1. Beer
Well yeah, beer is ok, but ales rock. At least that’s what I’ve found as I’ve reached my rather advanced age.

2. J. Crew

Cant’ say I ever shopped there.

3. Department stores

Well WalMart and Amazon are still around, Target too.

4. Motorcycles
Yeah I was reading how Harley Davidson is heading for the skids. I think part of it is the love of the internal combustion engine is fading. Even in cars it’s been so automated and computerized – the cars actually tell you when to do things like change oil, etc.

5. Diamonds

Well that’s because of DeBeers and the whole blood diamond. I’ll buy man made diamonds – you know, take a lump of carbon and heat and compress it.

6. Golf

Alas, something I never got into was golf. Couldn’t see the point of whacking a tiny little ball around the green.

7. Bar soap

Well yeah – even this old codger has switched to liquid soaps.

8. College football

Football in general for me has always been boring. So ymmv.

9. Lunch

Now lunch – that’s a necessity. Millennials just don’t know it yet.

10. McDonalds

Agreed – they lost their way a long time ago. And now McDonald’s is trying to make up for lost time.

11. Vacations

Well that’s because corporate interests have beaten the union guaranteed notion of time off out of the current generation.

12. Napkins

Well yeah – paper towels work just fine.

13. Cars

When a car is $20,000 or more you can see why. Ten you have things like Zipcar, Uber, Lyft etc.

14. Crowdfunding

I’m not so sure on this one.

15. Wine

If only they haven’t been taught which wines are good, which are so-so and I’ll let you in on a secret – a 750ml bottle is about $10. And sometimes for that price you’ll find a fantastic bottle of wine, sometimes an OK bottle. You have to find out what you like.

16. Wine corks (almost!)

Well yeah I find screw tops highly suspicious.

17. The Toyota Scion

Well Scion missed the mark. They had intended the Xa and Xb to appeal to youth, but instead it appealed to septagenarians because it was easy to get in and out of. This is what happens when you let your marketing division and accounting division have control.

18. Fabric softener

This one doesn’t make sense to me. They want their clothes to have static cling and feel rough on their skin?

19. Marriage

Think about it – more than half of marriages aren’t successful. And the kids from those unions are now our millennials. So that explains it.

20. The McWrap

The reason being they couldn’t sell them. Look, as I said earlier they lost it a couple decades ago.

21. Handshakes

Yeah fist bumps pretty much fixed that.

22. The Canadian tourism industry

I’ve been to Canada – looks very much like the U.S. And there are some sights that are worth a visit. But with the bureaucracy over crossing international borders was put in place, it’s too much of a hassle.

23. Light yogurt

24. Gambling

I’d hope better understand of mathematics and statistics are responsible for that.

25. Hotels

Well yeah – connectivity is key.

26. Relationships

Well because they were part of the wreckage of the until death thing in marriage.

27. Marmalade

Oh jelly, jam, marmalade is awesome.

28. Running

I believe it was Oscar Wilde who said “Why stand when you can sit, why sit when you can lounge about.” or some such.

29. Cereal

Maybe not cereal – I went away from it some time ago. Some nuts, yogurt etc. Eggs etc.

30. The anti-aging industry

Aging is part of the genetic lottery and there’s not much you can do to change that although CRISPR/CAS9 holds some promise.

31. Buffalo Wild Wings

We rarely eat at places like this ourselves. Look, I’ve embraced home cooked meals. They’re in many cases less expensive too.

32. Focus groups

Well – it’s just the technology that changed everything.

33. Travel marketing

I did a few months with a travel place that catered to the over 50 crowd. They can pretty much afford the travel, kids can’t.

34. Working

Well they were brought up as special little snowflakes. That’s a big deal.

35. Credit

Yeah credit is a losers game. Save, budget and then it’s easier for you. Learn the patience and wait for the good stuff.

36. Trees

This one boggles the mind. I went the opposite way – electronic books rock.

37. The American Dream

Well see answers on cars and credit and you have the answer.

38. America

I don’t think they’re killing America. Old white men are killing America.

39. Democracy in general

Well because we’ve never had true democracy. We’ve had a representative republic since the founding of the United States.

40.  Home Depot

Well they are owned by a bigoted family. So that might explain it.

41. Self-pity

Well yeah – doesn’t surprise me. My parents generation got the most, I got squat.

42. The 2016 presidential election

Well being that the Democratic party wants to play bait and switch, and the Republicans are for the most part assholes, who the hell wants to vote for any of them? See my answer about old white men.

43. Consumerism

Ahem, their elders did that. I strongly support fix and not dispose.

44. Suits

Suits – here’s what I know. Put a suit on and you can pretty much get away with anything.

45. Dinner dates
Well yeah – this one doesn’t surprise me at all>

46. Movies

Actually Hollywood is killing the movie business. There hasn’t been a movie worth paying for this year so far.

47. Sex

Well this is sort of similar to the wine thing. They don’t know what to do.

48. Gyms

With increasing evidence saying that dietary sugar is responsible for most of the ills we suffer you can see why.

49. Serendipity

Serendipity will always exist. Millennials just haven’t the life experience yet.

50. Loyalty programs

Well yeah cheapest rooms rule.

51. Loyalty in general

Perhaps because companies haven’t been loyal to their employees for some time.

52. Taking risks

Risk is a funny thing. We’re all pretty much risk averse.

53. Patriotism

Of course jingoistic patriotism is fading.
54. Cruises

Being captive on a boat isn’t generally my cup of tea.

55. Applebee’s

Lots of repeats on this list.

56. Fashion

Oh child, lots of us don’t get fashion.

57. Hangout sitcoms

Because they’ve not had the experience themselves.

58. The Big Mac

See answers on McDonalds.

59. Stilettos

See fashion.

60. Romance

Most generations don’t have romance down.

61. The 9-to-5 workday

This one reeks of extreme horse shit. Let them have a kid or three and see how they feel about the 9 to 5.

62. The NFL

Well this goes along with the college football thing. Boring.

63. Gen X’s retirement

Yeah well 401(K) is pretty much a ponzi scheme.

64. The Olympics

Yeah – who wants to deal with the hassles to be honest.

65. Brunch

Again, it’s because they haven’t learned about it yet.

66. The European Union

The EU has been doomed from the start.

67. Baby names

Well the special snowflakes want their spawn to be even more special.

68. Banks

Well since the 1970’s banks have gotten increasingly greedy. So this make sense.

69. Oil

Well only driving when one has to has changed things. It accounts for the price of oil below $50 per barrel for almost a year now. And it’s not going to get any better as the price of electric vehicles comes down.

70. Everything

This one is just a catch all. Much of this is horse shit anyways.

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